Salah Satu PENYAKIT Orang Melayu

"Queen Victoria chose white not because it symbolized purity, but because she wanted to show her people that she would run the country in an economical way. White was a much less expensive color to make than the colors typically popular for wedding dresses at the time (red, black, and purple). Plus, it gave her the option of using some lace that she already owned, rather than having something specially made.




So basically, the white dress was originally a political move."


This shows how practical people were about weddings back then. Unlike now, you see telecasts of celebrities getting married lavishly. Datuk Muszaphar, the Naza girl, Dato' Siti Nurhaliza...and the likes.

I don't see telecasts of Western celebrity marriages. In fact, they have it privately with the close families.

However, it is different with our local culture. We are so used to gotong-royong that we need to include all the community in it, well, now that we have caterings and all those bridal agencies, we don't need that anymore, but it is common practice to invite everyone, and for these celebrities, it is chance for them to bank in more fame and fans, make it a memorable wedding.

"ooohhh...see that necklace around the bride's neck? It's worth five bungalows!"

"oohhh!! did you see the cake? they studded it with diamonds."

so on and so forth.

AND what I hate about this community spirit is the gossiping and the wild fantasies to outdo each other.

what started off as a religious obligation (to get married), now becomes a show of excessive expenditure.

I see girls posting videos of those lavish weddings on Facebook and tagging their boyfriends: "Sayang, kan best kalau wedding kita macam ni?"

why is it that the Malay's perception of a wedding is that it has to be lavish? why can it not serve a more practical purpose? why must there be bunga telurs that costs thousands to make and all those expensive clothing and catering.

yes, I know it is a special day to be celebrated, it is tradition (but it is not a necessity), and people now no longer have the time nor voluntary spirit to join in the gotong royong to cut costs, but must all the spending be to the extent of debts because you wanted to have a lavish wedding? or worse still, to outdo another persons wedding?

why must there be an embarassment if a person's wedding is not as lavish as the other?

to me, a wedding is just the akad nikah. the ijab kabul, the bride and bridegroom with the kadi and the saksi and the wali, and the mahar. there is no need of hantarans or even persandingans. Marriage is basically just allowing you to...you know, to put it in crude terms. I can put it in a more "hopeless romantic" perspective, but nahh...

I don't see any reason why there has to be a four day event when you can just get it over with in one night. That is even more economical.

Even if you have a lavish wedding and you have debts around your waist, and you are trying to raise a family, better not get married at all then if you think that the ceremony has to be lavish. Priority should be put on the family you're trying to build. How will you support your family if you have debts to settle?

Think first before deciding to get married in a lavish way. It is a big decision, and it can not be rushed.