Skip to main content

Work Things Out?

How am I holding up lately?
haha, funny question.
Recently I went back to Kelantan for an interview for a Bank Negara scholarship.
YES!!! I'm on par with Faisal! he got Bank Negara too.
but i am not as confident that I'd get it.
I wondered if it was really me who walked through the door yesterday. I just wouldn't know for sure. However, I'm not that confident that I'd get it.
but even if I don't. I'd pledge to myself that I'd get the big one: the go-wherever-I-like-in-whatever-jurusan-scholarship one for top 5 malaysia SPM 2009.
well, we'll see how I hold up for sure!
anyway, along with me the other day, there were two others from my school: syuhada and hairul.
that syuhada gal sure is making me run for my money
she's a tough cookie
a lot tougher than hakim
hairul, on the other hand, sure is a testy one
not easily susceptible to my..ehem, charms?
don't get me wrong, I just do it for kicks, maybe, perhaps as a confidence boost, in way?
but it is a great way to know people
yes, I admit it, I'm lonely
socializing makes me feel better, even though the bonds may not actally be one to last.
but at least you know your surroundings, which is a good thing, for me.
so, what should I call myself?
I'm looking for a term between a social bug and an anti-social lone wolf.
All in all, I'm sick of this hectic life. I want to unwind.
When I get back, I'm gonna face tons more work to do, and it seems strange that I'm getting busier with each school holiday.
I don't mind being busy though, I'd rather be busy than not doing anything at all,
but in way, I have to 'enjoy' being busy where somewhere along the run, there has to be a sliver of minutes of excitement.
so, I do all the things I do supposedly 'just for kicks'. You may not know what I'm hinting here, but I just want to let it out in a 'censored' manner, but it's nothing bad at all, trust me.
God, I can't imagine how relationships actually 'work out'!
I hate my pessimistic outlook on..what? almost anything?
why do I let myself suffer? don't I have anything better to do?
heh. what a rhetorical question, if you ask me!
no, its not haiirul, I'm talking about.
But being separated miles away that only gives me like, once a year to meet him?
what torcher! and yet, they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder?
Being a sceptic, i don't think it'll work out at all.
whoa! suddenly on the spur of the moment, I suddenly remeber all that puking I had to endure two days ago in the car!
the grossest ordeal I had to suffer when babysitting. yuck!


Popular posts from this blog

Taming Tigers

If you have not read this book, get you hands on it quick!
Yes, I'm serious, it is that good.

simply because it is unforgivingly, brutally honest.
What I love of this book is basically the fact that not a single word has gone to waste. Every single description is relevant, and makes for a pinpoint analogy of each scenario in the book. When you traverse each sentence, you already have an idea what the author is trying to portray in the way he describes what the characters do, wear, walk, talk. the simple gestures represent the very soul of the culture so imminently depicted in this book.
And the main character, Balram, seems so real that you could almost believe that he actually runs around in the streets, er, slums of India. The complexity of emotions and the inner turmoil he felt as he expresses his views on the issues.
The author's ideas of a new-age caste of small-bellied and big-bellied people and the Rooster Coop has been compellingly displayed along the storyline, and y…

Of Engineering and Life

Betrayed by the worst atrociously shameful mark of femininity, the shy, embarrassed, immature, self-conscious, awkward, school girl blush in the presence of a drop dead attractive member of the opposite sex. *facepalm* I'm gonna be fricking 21 years old, hormones, please stabilize.

Sang Bayu Membisikkan Rinduku Kepada Samudera Cinta-Nya

Menatap kebiruan
yang disulam hijau permata
hamparan keindahan luar biasa

Mutiara jernih
ibarat sungai yang berlari
membasahi pipi
sekali sekala jatuh ke pasir

bayu dingin yang mengelus
membelai-belai wajahnya yang lesu
muram dek cuaca yang mendung
awan-awan kelabu
membaluti langit yang biru,
suram di lubuk kalbunya

meronta-ronta hatinya
mencari nikmat ketenangan

meronta-ronta jiwanya
mencari kebenaran hakiki

ingin saja disapu
debu-debu penipuan
yang mengaburi pandangan mata hatinya

rindunya pada Kasih yang suci menggamit lagi

ampunilah hamba yang hina ini.
"terkenang-kenang pula saat-saat merenung ke kejauhan di Pantai Cahaya Bulan tatkala melihat gambar laut.." =)