Transience

Just back in Casa Subang! Apprently overdosed on anime songs. huhu. okay, here's the result of my mini poll on Facebook. Kamilah Kamil okay..just a survey for fun..am I a KL-ite or a Kelantanese? I am born and raised in KL for 18 years of my life, yet I do not have great bearings in KL. My dad's a Kelantanese, and after five years in Faris (a boarding school in Kelantan), I am able to speak the Kelantanese dialect quite well. I still speak it frequent...ly, and yes, most my statuses are in the Kelantanese dialect. So, what's the verdict? Ishaq Hakim You're a messed up Malaysian, in a good way though :) Syuhadah Muhamad kelate~~~   ALi AshRaf kelate celup   Abdulmajid Muhamad jadi ore sie   Wolf Volkmar an amalgamation of urban & kampung entity   Mohd Nor Iqbal ‎1 Q? Mkn budu x? Stands 50% of ur klntnese traits. ...Maybe hahahaha   Kamilah Kamil i eat budu only in nasi kerabu. I don't eat budu with ulam because I don't eat ulam.....

I'm going back to Casa Subang. Obviously, I can call my unit a house, but it is not a home. I had always wished I had more money to spare on groceries, and more time to do home-cooking. It doesn't even have a proper stove! The hotplate does'nt work. Most of us resort to cooking in a rice-cooker, well, I'm not going to do that to my rice-cooker. Ain't gonna spoil it. Yes, again, I am plagued with the need for money. Money is the key to good education, to good books, to good FOOD, to comfortable homes, and other luxurious excesses, yet it corrupts. Yes, there's that vision of a big mansion versus a moderate homey home, yet I see my more 'fortunate' friends and the food they get to enjoy..omg, a minimum of 50 bucks per plate, and such good food it is...ahh...if only I could savour it as well..this is what people call the finer things in life..I can live without a great wardrobe, although I do sometimes satisfy (and at times agitates) my longing for pretty c...

I don't know why I'm not raving about baju raya or kasut raya this year, but rather, lately, all those memories of celebrating raya in a kampung is coming back to me. I remembered when I was a little kid, I loved to chase all these creatures: and when I admitted this to my friends, they hardly believe me. I'm serious. This was what I used to do whenever my family and I go back to Kelantan during school holidays, of course, that was a long time ago. I now have my Raya in KL. Too many FUNNY childhood moments in Kelantan. I'll explain more when the mood strikes me. This essay is still not done. T_T

Isn't that picture pretty? Well, just some random picture I took from the net. Well, actually after the Book Thief, I felt like I didn't want to read anymore stories about Hitler and the Holocaust because it was too depressing, yet, throughout the times, people are still haunted by it, many books have been written about it. Such profound is the effect of the Holocaust to the world we live in today. Yeah, I do think it is one of the most inhumane thing that has ever been done, and I acknowledge the damage it did to the world, but to read about it? That's very depressing. Even for my literature analysis essay, I chose not to write about the Holocaust, despite the wider selections of titles that has the Holocaust as its theme. Quite a number of interesting titles, if I had the time, I would have read them, since it is on the list of recommended literature analysis titles, then most must have been quite good. I loved The Time Machine, and perhaps, I might write about the under...

laila's gymnastic 2008 Rahman formation KOT 2009 (the one I complained about, hahahha) yang Lord of the Flies trailer tu I will post after I present it this coming Wednesday ya.. hahhaa, Chem, Lord of the Flies and Advanced Functions still waiting for me..chow..

After many many headache-inducing affairs of the Lord of the Flies trailer production for English3U, I sort of got it done, I posted it on youtube, I'll put it on my blog once we presented it to the class first. Anyway, here are a few shots of the filming: the "shoreline" the first assembly. see how 'manly' the manner I'm sitting in? hahahha. I'm supposed to be Jack. paint! ouuuyeahhh..Golding was right about the face-paint effect. I hardly felt any shame for what I was doing in public. Savage man. dancing around a "fire". I'm dancing with a mop stick. "killing" simon Ralph and Jack face-off..those bars were from my apartment clothes stand thingy. It took me one night and a whole day to get the editing done. I have never used the moviemaker at all in my life, the first time I editted it, the file disappeared. but alhamdulillah, it's sort of done. The guy who was supposed to edit it suddenly ditched us. anyway, I f...

1. advanced functions (God, so much work!) 2. English: Lord of the Flies second draft (add citations-and I didn't bring my friggin' file back home) and ISU novel read-up 3. Chemistry lab report. When I get back to Casa, I have to rpint the summary thingy. 4. EAP compare and cotrast essay on two American Idol winners' career. 5. Compter Science notes on BB7 read-up. so NOT an enjoyable holiday. Yeah sleeping in was bliss, but in the end, I feel wasted. I needed that, but still. This is what CPU does to you. Had I finished everything, I'd certainly enjoy it more, in fact ten-fold compared to my SPM break, and I surely wouldn't complain of being bored. That's what I love about CPU, but in this condition now..hurhh..sabar jelah..

A Question of Humanity: A Short Story On The Social Evil of Baby-Dumping. The sight was a gruesome one. It will forever be imprinted on my mind. The stench of decay filled my nostrils. Even in solitude I could sometimes still smell faint traces of it. The image will always come back to haunt me for the years to come. There, sprawled on the grass in open space, with the face flat on the ground like a broken doll, was a rotting corpse of a new born baby. Flies buzzed around above where the body lay. Ants seemed to claim the body for their own. It was heart-breaking. There was no proper burial; it was as if the baby was just chucked out like garbage on the side of the streets, thrown away without any feelings of love, or compassion, let alone respect or sense of humanity. Even garbage was disposed of in a more ‘dignified’ manner- properly wrapped in a garbage bag. I noticed that one of the arms was missing. The joint where the arm was supposed to be was just a hole. The flesh arou...

I am surprised despite the fact that my handwriting sucks and my work sloppy, you said that I'd worked hard. I really appreciate it. The reasons why I worked hard, although everybody else would say that English3U is not even counted in our final grades, well, for one thing, I actually feal greatly appreciated for a job well done. That's a good enough motivation to keep me going, aside from the fact that I do want to outdo others(which I have yet to achieve), and yeah, I see it as a practice run for English4U. I know you work hard to mark our grades, as well on you lesson plans, and it makes it a lot worth to work hard in your class. Yes, I complain while doing it, but I still do it. The fact that you're extending my dateline because of my 'hard work', makes me feel a tad bit guilty. I know I can't possibly do it tomorrow, I have Chemistry, but the fact that you're granting me that extra time, I feel overwhelmingly grateful, and guilty. I am so scared of unde...

videos!! cow heart dissection 18th birthday celebration. coming up cow heart dissection part 2 and 3, laila's gymnastic and rahman formation.

Instructions: 1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/mp3/mp4/ipod/windows media player/mixpod/etc on shuffle. 2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer. 3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS! 4. Tag 10 or more friends who might enjoy doing this. IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY? bencinta, Faizal Tahir WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? just dance, Lady Gaga HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY? we are the world, Micheal Jackson WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE? wrong impression, Natalie Imbruglia (oh, bahaya) WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? gee, Girls Generation WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? I don’t wanna miss a thing, Aerosmith WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS? dan, Sheila On 7 WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? speechless, Micheal Jackson WHAT IS 2+2? Perfectly lonely, John Mayor WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND? di atas normal, Peterpan ...

TOO DISTRACTING, BUT I'LL BE BACK. LATER.

Sue me if I seem ungrateful. I don't know if what I write is something sensitive or not, but it's been in my head for quite a while now. oh well, part and parcel of adjusting here. When I was little, I went to a mixed-race kindergarten. Well, all the races are of equal ratio, and the teachers are all of different races. I was pretty okay. I started off speaking in malay, but since we were in a mixed community and even some of the teachers were not from Malaysia, English was the prime medium. Then, in primary school, I still had teachers ofmany races, but I was in an all-malay batch. I was treated like a freak of course because I spoke in English. yeah, I was quite bothered by it, but it never changed me a bit. I still went on with my English speaking, and I wrote stories, all of which never involved local characters. At that time, I admit. I HATED being a Malay. If I had it my way, I wouldn't be one. I had always dreamed of being one of my characters, a foreigner, sin...

Nothing but a thread, I'm holding on with nothing but a thread and I'm hoping that it's enough to get me through. Loneliness gets to me, the garden is untended yet, I still hope for the flowers to bloom. Empty dreams forever unmaterialized without effort. Meaningless. I must wake up.

I put my hand on the glass pane; I can see the outside, but that's all that I can ever do. From behind that pane, I see everything. Everything that I just can't go back to anymore.